Tuesday, October 4, 2011

There are many ways to destroy EZ Mac

I first discovered this sad fact while in college. Although I was lightyears ahead some of my non-laundry-doing, never-home-alone-before, how-do-I boil-water peers, I still had a lot to learn when it came to the fine art of feeding myself.

More often than not (and much more often than my budget should have allowed) I found myself dining out, saved from both the arduous preparation and cleanup that home cooking, in all it's domestic glory, entails.

However, on the rare nights I found myself without dinner plans, I would rummage through my meager supply of groceries, replenished with fine cuisine such as frozen french bread pizzas and Spaghettios, to dig out the solid gold that was EZ Mac.

Just add water, instant perfection!

Feeling slightly smug on behalf of the human race for evolving from the active task of tracking and staking wild animals, I would pour the macaroni into the carefully measured amount of tap water and wait impatiently!

Three minutes later, my macaroni and cheese piping hot and the perfect shade of traffic cone orange, I would indulge in cheesy goodness.

I'm sad to say my friends that it took me too bowls of macaroni and my spoon scraping on the wooden table instead of the bowl to notice that the bowl I had been using was styrofoam. It had literally been melting off into my macaroni and cheese for each microwaved moment.

To this day, I will still blame my bad directional sense and inability to wink on the day I ate styrofoam.